Issue 81, Fall 1981
Who knows what goes on in their heads? said Jocasta. They were well into the second carafe of wine. Not me, I’ve stopped even trying. It used to be women that were so mysterious, remember? Well, not any more, now it’s men. Me, I’m an open book. All I want is a good enough time, no hassle, a few laughs, a little how-you-say romance, I’ll take the violins if they’re going around, dim lights, roses, fantastic sex, let them scrape the pate off the rug in the morning, is that too much to ask? Are they afraid of my first name or something, is that it? Remember when we all batted our eyes and pretended not to know what dirty jokes meant and crossed our legs a lot and they chased around like pigs after a truffle and God did they complain. Frigid, cock teaser, professional virgin, remember those? Remember panty girdles, remember falsies, remember Peter Pan brassieres, in the front seat after the formal, with your wires digging into his chest?
Rennie didn’t remember these things too well. But she didn’t say so, she didn’t want to remind Jocasta about her age.There’s probably men still around who don’t think a woman’s a woman unless she feels like a car grille or the insides of a toaster, said Jocasta. Not the back seat though, God forbid the word should get around you were an easy out.
Well, so two months ago this man, a nice enough man, nice shoulders, said why didn’t we go out for dinner. I’ve known him a while, I like him okay, he’s fine, nothing wrong with him, not ultra bright but not a nylon stocking murderer either, and I’ve always felt I wouldn’t mind, you know. If the occasion should arise. Well, it looked as if it was arising, pardon the pun, so I tarted myself up, nothing too obvious, I just bought this fabulous black knitted sheath for the store, remember bat wings?
So out we go, he was paying it seems, though I did offer, it’s a new place over on Church, not too many of those damn asparagus ferns shedding down your back, I had the quails, which was a mistake, gnawing those tiny bones and trying to look soignee. But everything was going fine, a lot of eye contact, we talked about his career, he’s into real estate, doing up downtown houses. All he has to do is beat off the Marxists, the ones that rent rather than owning. The ones that own don’t care, it jacks up their property values.