I am being forcibly retained in the land of no repute. Here all the chiefs of staff are too punch drunk to drop bombs on anyone. Liberation is passe for all except a few debutantes who have put their ostrich feathers in mothballs. Slavery is strictly optional and enjoys considerable popularity in some of the best homes. Backgammon runs a close second, followed by painterly notions of the sublime. Unrequited love has become a game of wits played between satiated hedonists. There is a street car that runs on hot air, which any senior citizen can ride for free by showing proof of having committed at least one unnatural act.