Goofus and Gallant Read Poetry

This piece was published as part of an April Fool’s post in 2015, entitled “Introducing The Paris Review for Young Readers.” It is fictional, and intended purely as a parody. It is not intended to communicate any true or factual information, and is for entertainment purposes only.

 From The Paris Review for Young Readers, Issue 1, Spring 2015




Goofus is fruitlessly puzzling over the author’s objectives.

Gallant swears he’ll never commit the Intentional Fallacy.


Goofus thinks Gallant’s enjambment “bears the marks of a derivative hack.”

Gallant politely suggests to Goofus that one of his trochees should be a dactyl.


Goofus recites Philip Larkin: “They fuck you up, your mum and dad … ” 

Gallant recites Elizabeth Bishop: “The old grandmother/ sits in the kitchen with the child/ beside the Little Marvel Stove ... ”


To read more of this piece, purchase the issue.