Aria Aber. Photo: Nadine Aber.
Aria Aber was raised in Germany. Her debut book Hard Damage (University of Nebraska, 2019) won the 2018 Prairie Schooner Book Prize in Poetry. Her poems are forthcoming or have appeared in The New Yorker, Kenyon Review, The Yale Review, The New Republic, and elsewhere. She was the 2018–2019 Ron Wallace Fellow at the University of Wisconsin–Madison.
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“Afghan Funeral in Paris”
The aunts here clink Malbec glasses and parade their grief with musky, expensive scents that whisper in elevators and hallways. Each natural passing articulates the unnatural: every aunt has a son who fell, or a daughter who hid in rubble for two years, until that knock of officers holding a bin bag filled with a dress and bones. But what do I know? I get pedicures and eat madeleines while reading Swann’s Way. When I tell one aunt I’d like to go back, she screams It is not yours to want. Have some cream cheese with that, says another. Oh, what wonder to be alive and see my father’s footprints in his sister’s garden. He’s furiously scissoring the hyacinths, saying All the time when the tele-researcher asks him How often do you think your life is a mistake? During the procession, the aunts’ wails vibrate: wires full of crows in heavy wind. I hate every plumed minute of it. God invented everything out of nothing, but the nothing shines through, said Paul Valéry. Paris never charmed me, but when some stranger asks if it stinks in Afghanistan, I am so shocked that I hug him. And he lets me, his ankles briefly brushing against mine.
“Operation Cyclone, Years Later”
For all I know, God could be, after all, favoring a mountain boy brown with dust, his brow calloused from the memory of men he’s stoned to death, pissed on the corpse of. He is a student. He has seen, so has been ruined; each eyeball astonished with what has shot through its pupil: a body will morph, in fall, into its surrounding—even dam. Even stone. We are what we are taught, yes, but also what we hope for. I hope for more than a war that whittles us to chameleons or refrigerated paper tags hanging from ankles. It is so certain, where we’ll end, yet arbitrary are the words determining the trajectory of our journeys; a name, too, is a gene and may flourish or impugn the chromosome. Students hope to be cradled by mothers—hope for lunch, an hour to play ball. Students rock back and forth, warmed by the water of prophecy. A lie, if repeated ad nauseam, eventually becomes a prayer. And a cyclone is not a cyclops although it too has an eye— it can see. But would it testify? If the myths are right, the student gathers, then science is right, and the god particle isn’t, in the end, meant to be kind to us. Still, the student imagines God as moving, colorful shapes. He hums before pulling the firing pin, singing I am a student, I am a student, I am a student of God, and he is right, for that he is, and the rotten field we have scythed of this country is his school.
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