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Train Robberies for Everyone, and Other News
By
Dan Piepenbring
May 1, 2014
On the Shelf
Marius Amdam,
The Great Train Robbery
Junot Díaz on getting an MFA
: “I didn’t have a great workshop experience. Not at all. In fact by the start of my second year I was like:
get me the fuck out of here
. So what was the problem? Oh, just the standard problem of MFA programs. That shit was
too white
.”
Al Feldstein, the editor who turned
Mad Magazine
into an institution in the late fifties,
has died, at eighty-eight
. “In his second issue, Mr. Feldstein seized on a character who had appeared only marginally in the magazine—a freckled, gaptoothed, big-eared, glazed-looking young man—and put his image on the cover, identifying him as a write-in candidate for president campaigning under the slogan ‘What—me worry?’”
When print books are scanned and converted into e-books, a process called optical character recognition is supposed to ensure that all of the letters are “read” correctly. But
things sometimes go awry
, and your e-book includes sentences like this: “‘Bertie, dear Bertie, will you not say good night to me,’ pleaded the sweet, voice of Minnie Hamilton, as she wound her anus affectionately around her brother’s neck.”
DreamWorks’ Jeffrey Katzenberg has
a dim view of the future of the cinema
: “A movie will come out and you will have seventeen days, that’s exactly three weekends, which is 95% of the revenue for 98% of movies. On the eighteenth day, these movies will be available everywhere ubiquitously and you will pay for the size [of the screen you watch it on]. A movie screen will be $15. A 75” TV will be $4.00. A smartphone will be $1.99… ”
In praise of train robberies
: “Dismemberment and armed robbery have been lost in today’s commuting experience … A few train robberies would do wonders for commuter attitude. Instead of insisting the city clean up all the snow as opposed to just most of it; instead of complaining that the Citi Bike seats are too long or short, too hard or squishy; instead of issuing eye rolls when a passenger shoves in ahead of closing doors, disrupting their Candy Crush level—a train heist would remind folks that any arrival, even a tardy one, is a blessing.”
What’s wrong with contemporary philosophy
? “The exclusion of the agrarian and nomadic, in favor of the urban and sedentary. The problem is not just ‘the West’, or Europe, or masculine domination, or white supremacy, or even the intersection of all of these. The problem is the city.”
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