{"id":84932,"date":"2015-04-20T12:40:41","date_gmt":"2015-04-20T16:40:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/?p=84932"},"modified":"2015-04-20T12:57:47","modified_gmt":"2015-04-20T16:57:47","slug":"the-jerk-alliance","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2015\/04\/20\/the-jerk-alliance\/","title":{"rendered":"The Jerk Alliance"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_84938\" style=\"width: 610px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/advicefromaverynagryman.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-84938\" class=\"wp-image-84938\" src=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/advicefromaverynagryman.jpg\" alt=\"advicefromaverynagryman\" width=\"600\" height=\"354\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/advicefromaverynagryman.jpg 640w, https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/advicefromaverynagryman-300x177.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (min-width: 62.5em) 67vw, 100vw\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-84938\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Tim Drage, <i>Advice from a Very Angry Man<\/i>, ca. 2000.<\/p><\/div>\n<p>It can be exhausting, avoiding collusion. Jerks are always trying to make you complicit in their entitlement.<\/p>\n<p>You know what I\u2019m talking about. Someone, say, yells at a bartender. Then he looks around trying to enlist allies. Can you believe this guy?! his eyes say.\u00a0It\u2019s us against the crazies, right?! This city, right?! People, right?! And even though it\u2019s probably as close to an impulse towards collectivism as this person will ever experience, it is crucial in that moment that you make him feel completely alone.\u00a0<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Traveling jerks, in particular, demonstrate a touching faith in the world\u2019s empathy.\u00a0I need to make a connection!\u00a0they explain. Or, I need to get on this flight,<em>\u00a0<\/em>or,\u00a0I want to control the weather! And not only do the rest of us not care, we <em>actively<\/em> don\u2019t care. We care <em>less<\/em> than we normally do about other peoples\u2019 problems.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIs everything okay?\u201d asks the flight attendant.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cUm, not really,\u201d says the man in business class. \u201cWhere\u2019s the tawny port?\u201d And then of course he mistakes your look of incredulity for one of complicity and gives you a\u00a0\u201cwhat\u2019re you gonna do\u00a0with this kind of service?\u201d<em>\u00a0<\/em>shrug as the port arrives.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>That said, these moments can be tragic. \u201cWhere\u2019s the manager?!\u201d demands an old man in the local Citibank, sticking his head into the office where you\u2019re sitting with an employee sorting out some business. \u201cYou people!\u201d he says to you. \u201cWe can\u2019t find anything! Don\u2019t try looking for help\u00a0<em>here<\/em>!\u201d And then he leaves and your eyes meet those of the bank employee, and there is indeed a certain complicity\u2014but the original man is more alone than ever.<\/p>\n<p><em>Sadie Stein is contributing editor of <\/em>The Paris Review<em>, and the <\/em>Daily<em>\u2019s correspondent.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It can be exhausting, avoiding collusion. Jerks are always trying to make you complicit in their entitlement. You know what I\u2019m talking about. Someone, say, yells at a bartender. Then he looks around trying to enlist allies. Can you believe this guy?! his eyes say.\u00a0It\u2019s us against the crazies, right?! This city, right?! People, right?! [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":178,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13115],"tags":[17814,12511,17813,8032,17705,17815,15199],"class_list":["post-84932","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-our-daily-correspondent","tag-banks","tag-city-life","tag-entitlement","tag-first-person-2","tag-jerks","tag-port","tag-traveling"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.4 (Yoast SEO v25.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>On Jerks and Complicity<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Entitled people always seem to want you to join their crusade, Sadie Stein writes.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2015\/04\/20\/the-jerk-alliance\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Jerk Alliance by Sadie Stein\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"April 20, 2015 \u2013 It can be exhausting, avoiding collusion. 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