{"id":76422,"date":"2014-09-08T13:29:28","date_gmt":"2014-09-08T17:29:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/?p=76422"},"modified":"2014-09-08T13:44:03","modified_gmt":"2014-09-08T17:44:03","slug":"pastless-futureless-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2014\/09\/08\/pastless-futureless-man\/","title":{"rendered":"Pastless Futureless Man"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_76427\" style=\"width: 610px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/mrpipobrain.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-76427\" class=\"wp-image-76427\" src=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/mrpipobrain.jpg\" alt=\"mrpipobrain\" width=\"600\" height=\"483\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/mrpipobrain.jpg 988w, https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/mrpipobrain-300x241.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (min-width: 62.5em) 67vw, 100vw\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-76427\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Image: Patrick J. Lynch, medical illustrator<\/p><\/div>\n<blockquote>\n<p>\u201cThe Marivaudian being is, according to Poulet, a pastless futureless man, born anew at every instant. The instants are points which organize themselves into a line, but what is important is the instant, not the line. The Marivaudian being has in a sense no history. Nothing follows from what has gone before. He is constantly surprised. He cannot predict his own reaction to events. He is constantly being <i> overtaken <\/i> by events. A condition of breathlessness and dazzlement surrounds him. In consequence he exists in a certain freshness which seems, if I may so, very desirable.\u201d<br \/>\u2014Donald Barthelme, \u201cRobert Kennedy Saved from Drowning\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>I\u2019ve been watching and avoiding a man who lives in the present. We go to the same caf\u00e9, each of us alone. He resembles a distinguished physicist, the kind invited to appear on television when a scientific worldview is needed. So I was intent on listening to him when he stood up to greet his friend, also in his golden years.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The friend asked him how he had been doing.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOh, I don\u2019t know, I misplaced my laptop. I can\u2019t remember where I put it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDid you ask someone for help?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI think so. But you know I can\u2019t remember anything. And so I bought an iPad, but I lost that, too.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, I lost my car the other day.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo. Where?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d <!--more--><\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou don\u2019t remember anything?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNo.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI see. I don\u2019t, either.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>What united these two seemed to be kindness and an ability to chat ad infinitum about everything they couldn\u2019t remember. They mentioned the failure of their memories more times than seemed possible.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHas your family visited?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know. I don\u2019t remember. How about you?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah. Hard to say. That\u2019s not something I remember.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It was kind of like a first date. They would get to the subject of movies only to realize neither could say anything specific. \u201cI think I saw that one. But, you know, I don\u2019t really remember anything.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, I know. I don\u2019t remember anything either. But I think it won an Academy Award.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don\u2019t know. I don\u2019t remember. Let me check.\u201d The friend reached for his phone. \u201cNo, it was only a Golden Globe.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And for an hour I listened. \u00a0<\/p>\n<p>One of the worst ideas to emerge since yoga and Buddhism came in vogue is how you ought to live in the present. Celebs hurried to the cause, which should have been fair warning for the rest of us to sprint in the other direction. Happiness exists only in the moment, we\u2019re told, in mindfulness, in attaining complete presence.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Here was one such presence.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes our schedules coincide. This pastless man orders the same cup of coffee every time, carrying an <em>Economist<\/em> or a book of history from the library. How he decided on a title was something that interested the Walter Benjamin in me. With time I started to imagine that someone chose for him.<\/p>\n<p>Often he falls asleep.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>One day a salesman sharing my table lit up when the man walked in. \u201cHey hey,\u201d the salesman said, immediately.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I felt ashamed for having never said anything to the man, despite having sat across from him dozens of times. But perhaps it isn\u2019t rude if he has no memory of it.<\/p>\n<p>The salesmen extended his hand. \u201cI wanted to say hi. But I\u2019m sorry, I forgot your name. I\u2019m Brian.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Of all the things to say, bringing up forgetting like that. It couldn\u2019t have been more perfect. The effect was electrifying. Perhaps the salesman has a sadistic streak, and often introduces himself this way to my subject, living out his version of <em>Groundhog Day<\/em>.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The man with no memory paused, adding to the suspense.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou know, I\u2019m so sorry, but you might remember I don\u2019t remember anything.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And he didn\u2019t say his name. He only met the guy\u2019s hand.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHow have you been?\u201d the salesman continued.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNot bad,\u201d the man said. I wondered how he decided what to say to that question. \u201cI lost three iPads and two computers this year. I can\u2019t find anything. It\u2019s terrible. I can\u2019t remember what happened. I put things down and then I lose them.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Their conversation stalled there, on these missing computers he\u2019s always bringing up.\u00a0The man went back to his coffee and the moldy tome on Churchill\u2019s wife. Why does he read, given that he\u2019s only going to forget it? It must satisfy some present moment in him, or it\u2019s a way to pass the time. The memoryless man started to fiddle with his iPhone. He leaned over to the salesman: \u201cI don\u2019t mean to bother you, but I wonder if I can use this to get on those WWW places.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe Internet?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYeah, that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cOf course, yes, that\u2019s what it\u2019s for.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGreat, but I forget how. Can you help me? How can I get my e-mail?\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The salesman examined the man\u2019s iPhone. \u201cWell, you\u2019ll need your password.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>A look of doom passed over him, as if to say, <em>Wow, I have to remember that, too<\/em>. The burden of it all, trying to keep up. He had no idea what the password was, and he didn\u2019t remember that he\u2019d gone through this same conversation with someone else an hour earlier. He put away his phone, stared out the window, yawned. Sipped his coffee. Eventually he picked the phone up again and shuffled through the various app windows, not opening any. He\u2019d mastered the act of swiping, at least.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>He has an umbrella. There\u2019s a drought on in LA. Someone takes great care of him, I assume. Hats off to you. Appearing bored, he opened his book, where there was a bookmark reminding him where he left off. Clever. You could put it in another spot and he wouldn\u2019t notice. You could change the book, for that matter.<\/p>\n<p>Leaning forward, he mumbled to himself as he read, but I couldn\u2019t make out his lips. He stared at the page as if he were reading. I know what reading looks like, and I\u2019d bet my house he wasn\u2019t really reading. He\u2019d stop, cover his mouth as if deep in thought, look around the caf\u00e9, and then scan the same paragraph again, this professorial man. He moved the bookmark out of the way as if he were going to continue on to the opposite page, but he didn\u2019t.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Over the months, I\u2019ve continued to study him. With time there came the new laptop with passwords scribbled on a sticker by the trackpad. The last time I saw him, with my phone still on the table, he looked up at me with great horror. Please, don\u2019t forget that, his whole face said.<\/p>\n<p><em>Bernard Radfar is the author of <\/em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/0988745607\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=0988745607&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=theparrev0f-20&amp;linkId=A54R3HIEXIYM5VZK\" target=\"_blank\">Mecca Pimp: A Novel of Love and Human Trafficking<\/a><em> and <\/em>Insincerely Yours: Letters from a Prankster<em>. Two of his screenplays are currently in development. Follow him <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/BernardRadfar\" target=\"_blank\">on Twitter<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cThe Marivaudian being is, according to Poulet, a pastless futureless man, born anew at every instant. The instants are points which organize themselves into a line, but what is important is the instant, not the line. The Marivaudian being has in a sense no history. Nothing follows from what has gone before. He is constantly [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":746,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4393],"tags":[15219,15220,15218,15217,217,163,15216,15221,15222],"class_list":["post-76422","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-first-person","tag-amnesia","tag-coffee-shops","tag-forgetfulness","tag-forgetting","tag-los-angeles","tag-memory","tag-mind","tag-mindfulness","tag-presence"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.4 (Yoast SEO v25.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Pastless Futureless Man<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Bernard Radfar on how you ought to live in the present.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2014\/09\/08\/pastless-futureless-man\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pastless Futureless Man by Bernard Radfar\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"September 8, 2014 \u2013 \u201cThe Marivaudian being is, according to Poulet, a pastless futureless man, born anew at every instant. 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