{"id":64778,"date":"2014-01-10T14:48:11","date_gmt":"2014-01-10T19:48:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/?p=64778"},"modified":"2014-03-07T13:58:17","modified_gmt":"2014-03-07T18:58:17","slug":"big-trouble-in-little-poland","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2014\/01\/10\/big-trouble-in-little-poland\/","title":{"rendered":"Big Trouble in Little Poland"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"pierogi\"<\/a>

Conspiracy lurks in every bite. Photo: Edsel L., via Flickr.<\/p><\/div>\n

It is pierogi weather. Here in New York, that means going to Greenpoint, or one of the Polish or Ukrainian coffee shops in the East Village, or maybe one of the two warring dairy luncheonettes nearby. Fried or boiled is a matter of heritage and personal inclination; ditto sour cream and fried onions. I will not tell another person how to live his or her life. This is America. But here is what I will<\/em> tell you:<\/p>\n

I was walking down First Avenue, hell-bent on pierogis, when my way was blocked by a very short lady in a very voluminous house dress and a fur coat. Her manner was urgent, her gaze intense.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere is something you need to know,\u201d she said, with the air of a fellow undercover operative making contact.<\/p>\n

We moved toward the curb so as not to block foot traffic, and she delivered her message.<\/p>\n

She had, she told me, been eating stuffed cabbage at the Little Poland restaurant \u201cfor almost thirty years.\u201d And yet, on this day, they had refused to serve her! \u201cThey said they didn\u2019t have any,\u201d she said, furious. \u201cI know they were lying. I saw people eating it.\u201d<\/p>\n

And that is not all. Following this outrage, she had made her way three blocks south, to Veselka, because sometimes you need stuffed cabbage, and no one will argue with that.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut,\u201d she continued ominously, \u201cdo you know what?\u201d I did not. She leaned in close and lowered her voice conspiratorially. \u201cThe exact same thing happened!<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n

I agreed that this was terrible, and would have been on my way, but she had yet to impart the most important piece of information.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cYou know who they were<\/em> serving?\u201d she demanded.\u00a0There was a moment of charged silence.<\/p>\n

\u201cWho?\u201d I finally asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cAttractive gay men!\u201d<\/p>\n

She looked at me with an air of knowing triumph.<\/p>\n

\u201cI wanted to tell you especially,\u201d she explained, \u201cso the same thing didn\u2019t happen to you.\u201d And then,\u00a0\u201cThank you for your time.\u201d<\/p>\n

I think we can agree that the gratitude was all mine. I did not attempt to order stuffed cabbage, because, really, life is hard enough.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It is pierogi weather. Here in New York, that means going to Greenpoint, or one of the Polish or Ukrainian coffee shops in the East Village, or maybe one of the two warring dairy luncheonettes nearby. Fried or boiled is a matter of heritage and personal inclination; ditto sour cream and fried onions. I will […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":178,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5027,13115],"tags":[12518,12517,12516,12519],"class_list":["post-64778","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-on-food","category-our-daily-correspondent","tag-little-poland","tag-pierogis","tag-stuffed-cabbage","tag-veselka"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nBig Trouble in Little Poland by Sadie Stein<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"January 10, 2014 \u2013 It is pierogi weather. 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