{"id":3904,"date":"2010-08-20T12:27:40","date_gmt":"2010-08-20T16:27:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/?p=3904"},"modified":"2010-10-27T14:09:29","modified_gmt":"2010-10-27T18:09:29","slug":"cougar-lit-gender-confusion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2010\/08\/20\/cougar-lit-gender-confusion\/","title":{"rendered":"Cougar Lit, Gender Confusion"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/boyreadingnedanshutzsmall2-211x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" width=\"211\" height=\"300\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-2978\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/boyreadingnedanshutzsmall2-211x300.jpg 211w, https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/boyreadingnedanshutzsmall2.jpg 271w\" sizes=\"auto, (min-width: 62.5em) 67vw, 100vw\" \/><em>Is there a story or book that can shed light on whether a woman should sleep with men she doesn&#8217;t love or know very well? Younger men, specifically?<\/em> \u2014A. Chesterfield<\/p>\n<p>You&#8217;re in luck! This is pretty much <em>the<\/em> animating question behind French literature of the last two hundred years, starting with <em>Adolphe<\/em> (no) and ending with <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Sexual-Life-Catherine-M\/dp\/0802139868\/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&#038;s=books&#038;qid=1282321496&#038;sr=8-1\">The Sexual Life of Catherine M.<\/a><\/em> (yes). No book puts the question more starkly than Colette&#8217;s masterpiece, <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Cheri-Last-movie-tie-\/dp\/0374532222\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321511&#038;sr=1-1\">Cheri<\/a><\/em> (yes and no: sex is tragic). Non-French novels have reached some memorable conclusions of their own. <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Good-Morning-Midnight-Jean-Rhys\/dp\/0393303942\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321544&#038;sr=1-1\">Good Morning, Midnight<\/a><\/em>, for instance (sex is tragic: get me a drink), or <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Piano-Teacher-Janice-Y-Lee\/dp\/0143116533\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321558&#038;sr=1-1\">The Piano Teacher<\/a><\/em> (<em>hell<\/em> no). (But skip it and see the movie.) <\/p>\n<p>Most novels, it has to be said, fall into the no column. The stories of Maupassant give one long resounding yes. You might begin with &#8220;A Country Excursion.&#8221; This story shocked Tolstoy, with good reason\u2014it is a cannon-blast against the nos. The movie version, Jean Renoir&#8217;s <em>A Day in the Country<\/em>, is lighter hearted. And if light-hearted is what you want, check out the Hungarian Stephen Vizincey&#8217;s 1965 novel <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Praise-Older-Women-Amorous-Recollections\/dp\/0226858863\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321600&#038;sr=1-1\">In Praise of Older Women<\/a><\/em> or Mario Vargas Llosa&#8217;s linked bagatelles <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Praise-Stepmother-Mario-Vargas-Llosa\/dp\/0312421303\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321616&#038;sr=1-1\">In Praise of the Stepmother<\/a><\/em> and <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Notebooks-Rigoberto-Mario-Vargas-Llosa\/dp\/B000IOEOKU\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321627&#038;sr=1-1\">The Notebooks of Don Rigoberto<\/a><\/em> (yes, yes, yes, yes, YES).<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><em>I&#8217;m increasingly confused about gender. Thoughts?<\/em> \u2014M. V. <\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t say &#8220;their&#8221; when you mean &#8220;his or her&#8221;; read <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Orlando-Wordsworth-Classics-Virginia-Woolf\/dp\/1853262390\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321638&#038;sr=1-1\">Orlando<\/a><\/em> and <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Middlesex-Novel-Oprahs-Book-Club\/dp\/0312427735\/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&#038;ie=UTF8&#038;qid=1282321648&#038;sr=1-1\">Middlesex<\/a><\/em>.<\/p>\n<p><em>Have a question for <\/em>The Paris Review? <em><a href=\"mailto:advice@theparisreview.org\">E-mail<\/a> us.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is there a story or book that can shed light on whether a woman should sleep with men she doesn&#8217;t love or know very well? Younger men, specifically? \u2014A. Chesterfield You&#8217;re in luck! This is pretty much the animating question behind French literature of the last two hundred years, starting with Adolphe (no) and ending [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[56],"tags":[57,17,675,456,179,36],"class_list":["post-3904","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ask-the-paris-review","tag-advice","tag-books","tag-gender","tag-lorin-stein","tag-sex","tag-women"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.4 (Yoast SEO v25.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Cougar Lit, Gender Confusion by Lorin Stein<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"August 20, 2010 \u2013 Is there a story or book that can shed light on whether a woman should sleep with men she doesn&#039;t love or know very well? 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