{"id":113819,"date":"2017-08-11T10:18:39","date_gmt":"2017-08-11T14:18:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/?p=113819"},"modified":"2017-08-11T10:29:28","modified_gmt":"2017-08-11T14:29:28","slug":"six-tips-writing-inspired-farmers-market","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theparisreview.org\/blog\/2017\/08\/11\/six-tips-writing-inspired-farmers-market\/","title":{"rendered":"Six Tips on Writing Inspired by My Farmers Market"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/a>

Lincoln Perry<\/p><\/div>\n

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  1. By now, we\u2019ve all expressed appropriate outrage about being advised to \u201cwrite what you know.\u201d At the farmers market, farmers are also growing what they don\u2019t know. \u201cClemony!\u201d last week\u2019s vendor told me, handing over three\u00a0stalks of Cleome. She\u2019d probably conflated the flower with Lemony Snicket. My dictionary icon gives me access to the information that Cleome means \u201ca different plant.\u201d Lesson: write or grow things with which you\u2019re unfamiliar.<\/li>\n
  2. Think for a moment of the plight of the painter\u2014for example, my husband. \u201cSee if you can get those things, the ones, you know, with the \u2026 \u201d (fingers squiggle the air in a Cy Twombly way). \u201cDo you mean those\u2014 \u201d \u201cNo, not those, the, they\u2019re sort of big bulbs, they have \u2026 \u201d He means kohlrabi. \u201cI\u2019ll try, but they\u2019ll probably have cut off the whalebone corset things,\u201d I say, knowing that he wants to do a painting of kohlrabi, not eat it. Lesson: human beings struggle to find the right words, whether they\u2019re visual artists or writers, or maybe dancers who rise up on their, you know, pink things, their ballet slippers<\/em>, so they can stand on tippy-toes like this, Whooooops!\u201d (Last word was the lesson.)<\/li>\n
  3. My favorite farmer is Lettuce Man. He has a rather ordinary name, but in no other way is he ordinary. His celery looks like something you could climb if you needed to get leaves out of the gutters (a final reference to my husband who, unlike Trump, is not always pleased when I refer to him). Until Lettuce Man\u2019s business card faded into invisibility on the fridge, I often looked at Bill\u2019s name with great respect, in anticipation of the next market, wondering what new miracles he\u2019d manage. Lesson: Handing out a business card is fine, as long as you\u2019re already sure the other person actually likes you. Otherwise, as a writer, rethink it. Lesson: not just snobbery, but reverse snobbery, exists in the arts.<\/li>\n
  4. Notice the number of really oddly dressed people milling around the truck bed with its lowered hatch, displaying heirloom tomatoes your grandmother would definitely have passed up (a brown tomato flecked yellow?), and microgreens. If there\u2019s one-upmanship conversation among these bizarrely attired people, they\u2019re chefs, not yet in their ubiquitous red patent-leather clogs and puffy pants. You may pick up a few helpful hints no person who isn\u2019t on drugs would ever come up with. Lesson: you don\u2019t have to be part of the Trump administration to tell bizarre, grandiose lies.<\/li>\n
  5. Ask questions about the sugar content of the small-batch pies numbered like lithographs that have been made by the nice man in the bodice-pleated gingham apron, whose information sheet says he made the crust with organically grown rye ground into flour, using extra-virgin Tuscan olive oil as \u201cfat\u201d and hand-churned butter from free-grazing cows whose astrological signs are compatible. Lesson: it\u2019s better to have an agent.<\/li>\n
  6. Goth jewelry, however interesting, does not properly belong at the farmers market, but as you browse silver skulls with genuine acorn eyes, do ask what she<\/em> buys at the market. She will have gotten there very early and have tastes different from yours (or do goths buy fiddlehead ferns?). Again, you might get cooking tips, or at least some good stories. Lesson: if you don\u2019t bring up your galleys, she probably won\u2019t bring up the manuscript she\u2019s working on. Go home, keep quiet, and cook happily.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

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    Ann Beattie is the author, most recently, of\u00a0<\/em>The Accomplished Guest. Read her Art of Fiction interview\u00a0here<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Write or grow things with which you\u2019re unfamiliar.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":579,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[30058],"tags":[1392,30060,29709,15606,30063,411,30061,12754,30062,2393,75],"class_list":["post-113819","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-on-writing","tag-ann-beattie","tag-cleome","tag-farmers","tag-farmers-markets","tag-fiddlehead","tag-humor","tag-kohlrabi","tag-lemony-snicket","tag-lettuce-man","tag-words","tag-writing"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nSix Tips on Writing Inspired by My Farmers Market by Ann Beattie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Write or grow things with which you\u2019re unfamiliar.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" 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